MALCOLM TURNBULL – BACK TO THE FUTURE

Hello my dear Liberal Party switchboard operator. Please put me through to NBN Co – that’s the National Broadband Network Company – if my carrier pigeon didn’t arrive there 30 minutes ago.

No need to get smart with me! I know broadband hasn’t been invented yet. I’m trying to get back to the future.

I hate being yesterday’s man. I’m a social progressive. I’m a republican. I believe in gay marriage. I’m social media savvy. And you should see the way I dress. But here I am stuck in the past, in this party that makes time go backwards – ever since I lost control, that is.

Did you say, “Lost control of your senses”?