Tag: LNP

Every morning, Campbell Cane Toad awoke, headed for the bathroom and kissed himself in the mirror. He then transformed into a besuited political being with the title: Premier of Queensland.

All was going well for Campbell until the 2015 landslide election when he lost his own seat, and with it his magic spell. Alas he could be humanoid no more. He was doomed, through the sorcery of the insidious LNP Panel of Evil, to become a squelched toad, with insidious consequences for the whole state. Dubbed ‘Campbell the Martyr’ by the panel, he was destined for sacrificial notoriety. The Panel of Evil was out for revenge in the wake the LNP’s statewide drubbing.

And so, on election night, stunned Queenslanders witnessed a concession speech delivered by a dying toad.