Good evening and thanks for joining us. You look ridiculous. You need all the joining you can get. You at the ABC are falling apart. Funding cuts must be taking their toll if they employ cheap shots like you to throw cheap shots at people like me. You are making a mockery of your role as opposition leader. I did not come here to be insulted. Why? Where do you normally go? I have come here for a serious political interview, not a Marx Brothers routine. And by the way, I’ll do the gags. With due respect Mr Shorten, it was you who started this fiasco in Marxisms. Are you accusing me of being a Marxist? I think I am losing the will to live.
Hello my dear Liberal Party switchboard operator. Please put me through to NBN Co – that’s the National Broadband Network Company – if my carrier pigeon didn’t arrive there 30 minutes ago.
No need to get smart with me! I know broadband hasn’t been invented yet. I’m trying to get back to the future.
I hate being yesterday’s man. I’m a social progressive. I’m a republican. I believe in gay marriage. I’m social media savvy. And you should see the way I dress. But here I am stuck in the past, in this party that makes time go backwards – ever since I lost control, that is.
Tanya Plibersek will not be silenced on the issue of gender inequality
“Gender inequality has been a driver of the women’s movement for many years; and economic inequality is inextricable linked with gender inequality. The equity principle at the heart of the women’s movement has a particular relevance today, in a world characterised by rising economic inequality.” This is an extract of a speech made by Tanya Plibersek MP, Deputy Leader of the Opposition, Shadow Minister for Foreign Affairs and International Development, and Member for Sydney at the National Labor Women’s Conference on 2 August 2014.
Immigration Minister Scott Morrison has hit back at UN criticism of Australia’s treatment of asylum seekers
Morrison hits back: Actual quote: “The most flagrant abuse of human rights I am aware of is the beheading and crucifying of people in Syria and Iraq, where Australia is seeking to relieve the humanitarian crisis.” Detainees: Possible response: Small consolation Mr Morrison. We would prefer to be beheaded and put out of our misery, rather than suffer this endless torture. Come on, be humane. Relieve our humanitarian crisis. Decapitate us! That’ll do your party the world of good in the polls. Those polls which are the reason we are here. Morrison: Actual quote on record: “My Christian faith remains the driving force for my family, beliefs and values.” Possible follow-on reply to detainees: I regret to inform you whingeing pack of heathens that my Christian faith prohibits me from having you decapitated. However, your invitation does have one particularly appealing feature. It would get the UN Committee on Torture off my back for causing you – “serious physical and mental suffering” – as they claim. I can’t be accused of torturing dead people, can I? I’ll have a chat with our party pollsters and see what they think. I’ll let you know how I get on. Regards, Scott.
ABC News: New UN Human Rights chief criticises Australia’s asylum seeker policy ….
For Christine, it’s tears of blood over logging, but John Williamson’s hit song has helped the cause:
Over the hill they go, killing another mountain Gotta fill the quota – can’t go slow Huge machinery wiping out the scenery One big swipe like a shearer’s blow Rip rip woodchip – turn it into paper Throw it in the bin, no news today Stirs my blood – gonna make a stand ~ Lyrics in part from the hit ‘Rip Rip Woodchip’ Full lyrics The official video on YouTube
Media release authorised by Christine Milne (27 October 2010): BOB BROWN TO INDUCT JOHN WILLIAMSON INTO A.R.I.A. HALL OF FAME Release in full
CUT YOUR LOSSES ON BUDGET, PETER COSTELLO URGES JOE HOCKEY
Joe Hockey has been urged to reboot his budget and scrap the unpopular $7 GP co-payment, with former Liberal treasurer Peter Costello saying governments have to cut their losses. The Treasurer is struggling to convince crossbenchers to back his budget, with key measures such as the Medicare co-payment and welfare changes facing defeat.
Would Senator George Brandis dare dispute Einstein’s Theory of Relativity?
Brandis: E = mc2 etc is just a maze of formulas that has nothing to do with reality. And if it has nothing to do with reality, it must be right … right?
Einstein: Wrong … “every action has an equal and opposite reaction”, so that’s my reaction to you.
Brandis: So you agree with me … every opinion has an equal and opposite right to be opposed … right?
Einstein: Wrong … opinions based on evidence outweigh medieval and ignorant opinions.
Brandis: You are medieval and ignorant … right?
Einstein: Wrong … I am an enlightened genius.
Brandis: Genius my arse, you authoritarian tyrant of political correctness. You scientists need to get a grip on unreality. Here’s my tip … get a haircut, get a real job and engage at an intellectual level.
23 April 2014
So, Senator George Brandis says people who believe the science is settled on climate change are “ignorant and medieval”.
And the reason: “the cultural tyranny of political correctness” which is apparently “sheer authoritarianism”. Climate change deniers are victims it seems, denied the opportunity of intellectual engagement.
And Penny Wong is apparently the “high priestess of political correctness” for daring to say that the science is settled on climate change, according to Mr Brandis.
Now there’s a turn up! Accusing a lesbian Opposition Senator of Asian descent in a same-sex partnership with an adopted daughter, guilty of political correctness when xenophobia, misogyny and homophobia are cumulative synonyms for Brandis’ own party.
George has now taken the convolution of political correctness versus incorrectness to previously unimagined farce.
Trouble is – apart from him being our Federal Attorney-General with the responsibility that goes with the job – he lives in a dream world where reality is just an inconvenient distraction.
After all, who needs the overwhelmimg majority of scientists who say our planet is perilously threatened, when Andrew Bolt says they are wrong.
Andrew has the right to freedom of speech – hence softening Section 18C of the Racial Discrimination Act – and freedom of speech is more important than anything but anything – even the planet itself.
So, according to the logic of George, if there is freedom of speech, there will be no climate change. Simple!
So a big thanks to Senator George Brandis for changing Section 18C. That masterstroke will save the planet.
In no time, the ice caps will re-form, extinct species will reappear and sea levels will fall – not that they ever rose – and climate change will be exposed as leftist conspiracy to subvert the right to free speech.
What a relief! All that fuss about nothing. Ah, it’s so nice to be relaxed and comfortable in a medieval and ignorant Australia!
The Adventures of Snugglepot and Cuddlepie starring Greens Leader Christine Milne
Link to related column by Bob Brown published in The Guardian on 6 March 2014 in which the former Greens leader cites Tony Abbott referring to the Greens as “the devil”.
TASMANIA: A DEATH WARRANT AGAINST PRISTINE FORESTS ABBOTT HAS NEVER SEEN
Although 1% of Tasmanian jobs are in logging forests and 15% in tourism, the Liberals are pushing for a move infused with a destructive materialist ideology which will decimate the region.
Genuine refugees suffer on Nauru as the government works to break their spirits.
Backtrack to June 2012 ~ ABC News video of an emotional Hanson-Young wiping away tears in the Senate as she recounts the story of a young asylum seeker.
The Coalition will rely on the clubs and gaming industry to develop support and counselling services for problem gamblers if it wins government. ”This is Dracula in charge of the blood bank,” Tim Costello said.
